Disgraced Derby County midfielder Robbie Savage today confessed that the credit crunch and high earners tax had hit the world of footballers where it mattered most. In the pocket.
The hirsute footballer finally laid bare the extent of his own financial problems by admitting he had posed as a woman to gain cheaper car insurance for his fleet of high-powered motor vehicles. However this was only the beginning of Savage’s problems as he revealed that he began to find the rouse to be both ’empowering’ and ‘exhilirating’ and had filled the adrenaline rush missing in his life since joining the Championship strugglers.
Robbie’s problems began spiralling out of control and only ceased when he was arrested by Morrison’s store detectives last Thursday whilst attempting to smuggle a black forest gateaux under his floral dress.
“It started off small,” explained the ashamed star on Cardiff Radio, “at first it was some lip stick here, some eye liner from Boots there. Then before you knew it I couldn’t stop. I felt invincible and sexy all at the same time. I didn’t even need half the stuff….. it was just the buzz.”
Robbie Savage is due at Derby Magistrates Court on 18th November.
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